jellybean

lots of things cookin' over here....which i will post about later, since we are gearing up for story's 2 and kai's 7 1/2 birthday party on saturday.

this past weekend i took jellybean to the vet to be put to sleep.  she wasn't eating and really out of sorts, so rowell and i decided it was time.  she slept with us the whole night and purred and cuddled for the last time.  we told kai and story that morning and we made a list of things we loved about jelly.  we gave her the last cuddles and kisses and then off i went.

it was very humane.  adobe animal hospital had a quiet room with a couch and separate door to leave, so i didn't have to go past all of the pets waiting in the lobby.  i sang to her and when she was gone i cried and gave her love.

when i got home with her we all said goodbye again and buried her in the yard by her favorite rosemary bush.  kai and story sprinkled bits of rosemary on her and some dirt and we told her how much we loved her.

sadness didn't really hit me until yesterday, i cried in rowell's arms last night.  jellybean was almost 17 yrs old.  I rescued her when she was 6 weeks old.  she was my buddy.  she moved with me so many times and we came a long way together in so many ways.

we planted flowers above her body this morning and placed the rocks that we found at the ocean.  we saw lots of worms in the fresh dirt and kai said jelly was sitting on top of the fence looking down at us.  i looked over and a squirrel ran past quickly.   kai said, "mommy, jelly's chasing the squirrel! she is free now to follow us everywhere.  she looks the same, she just has a blue outline all around her now."
thank you kai for being so open and showing me love and compassion.  thank you story for enjoying the worms while we were planting and making me touch them.  thank you rowell for holding me.

thank you jellybean for sharing the journey with me for so long, i love you girl...